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The best time to start teaching toilet skills is when your child is showing signs they’re ready. Some children may show signs of readiness as early as 18 months, but most children start learning between 2 and 3 years old, before they begin preschool or school.
Not all children show clear signs and that’s okay. Your child’s health and development can affect how ready they seem.
Signs your child may be ready for toilet skills
A helpful sign that your child might be ready is if they stay dry for more than 2 hours during the day.
Other helpful signs may include:
- noticing when they’ve done a wee or poo
- asking for a clean nappy or trying to take off a wet or soiled nappy
- showing interest in watching others use the toilet
- helping with daily routines like washing hands or getting dressed.
Note:
Some children may need extra help with toilet learning because of health or developmental needs. If that’s the case, it’s best to talk to a doctor or community health nurse. They can refer you to an allied health continence specialist such as a nurse continence specialist or medical specialist for advice.
You can also call the National Continence Helpline on 1800 33 00 66 to speak to a nurse continence specialist for advice and referral to local services.
How toilet learning happens over time
Babies don’t know when they need to wee or poo. Their bodies just do it automatically.
From around 18 months, children slowly start to notice the feeling of ‘needing to go’ and learn how to control it. This happens as they grow, develop and learn new physical skills.
These are the stages most children go through:
- can ‘hold on’ and stay dry overnight or wake up to use the toilet.
- no faeces (poos) overnight
- notice when they’re wet or soiled
- willing to sit on the potty or toilet
- start to feel when they need to go and can “let go” on the potty or toilet
- stay dry for longer and can wee or poo when sitting on the toilet
- begin asking to use the potty or toilet or may go by themselves
- can wee even if their bladder isn’t completely full
You can use a Toilet skills checklist to track what your child can do and what they’re starting to learn. This helps you set realistic goals and plan what to teach next.
Disposable nappies including pull-ups are designed to draw the urine (wee) away from your child’s skin to keep them clean and comfortable. This is very important when they’re babies. However, because nappies keep your child feeling dry, they may reduce your child’s ability to notice the sensation of being wet. This can sometimes delay or make it harder to see signs that your child is ready for toilet learning.
As a first step, it can help to give your child some time without nappies at home. This allows them to feel wetness and begin recognising their body’s signals, which supports early toilet learning.
Do you feel ready to support your child with toilet learning?
Teaching and supporting your child to use the toilet takes time and patience. It’s important that you feel ready too. Make sure you have the time and energy to be present, positive and consistent.
Think about what’s happening in your life. Big changes like moving house, starting a new job or having another baby can make it harder to start a new toileting routine with your child.
Consider who can help you, such as partners, grandparents, childcare staff or preschool teachers. Having support makes a big difference.
“Toilet learning includes lots of small skills taught over time. There’s no need to rush, teach everything at once or ‘toilet train in 3 days’. Allow time to teach one step at a time.”
Debbie Aitkins, Occupational Therapist
Other helpful skills to watch for
Children show certain skills when they want to do things on their own. These skills develop over time and help your child feel more confident with the new routine:
- walking to and from the toilet
- pulling pants down and up
- getting on and off the potty or toilet
- flushing the toilet
- washing and drying hands
- saying when they need to go to the toilet.
There’s also a Checklist for independence skills to help you track these.