Supporting bladder and bowel control in children

Learning to use the toilet is a big step for children. We explain how children’s bladder and bowel control develops, the signs to notice and simple, supportive steps families can take to help children feel more confident. It’s for parents, carers and families from all cultures and backgrounds.

Understanding bladder and bowel control

The bladder is an organ in the body that holds urine (wee). The bowel is an organ that absorbs nutrients the body needs and removes waste as faeces (poo). As the bladder and bowel fill, the body sends signals that it’s time to use the toilet. Learning to understand and respond to these signals is a big part of growing up and takes time and practice.

Some children take longer to develop the skills to notice and respond to their body’s signals, especially children with additional health or learning needs. Every child develops at their own pace.

If holding on is hard or urine (wee) or faeces (poo) leaks at times, this may be a sign of incontinence.
Incontinence is common across all ages, genders, cultures and backgrounds, and with the right support it can be managed and improved.

Bladder and bowel skills develop over time

As children develop bladder and bowel skills, they may move through stages where extra support is helpful, depending on their age and individual circumstances. As your child builds these skills, you may see things like:

• daytime wetting – going to the toilet very often, rushing to make it, damp or wet underwear or finding it hard to empty fully
• bedwetting (night-time wetting) – wetting during sleep, either often or sometimes
• soiling – small marks or faeces (poo) in underwear.

If your child was previously dry and starts experiencing wetting again, a quick check-in with your GP (doctor) can help identify treatable causes such as a urinary tract infection or constipation.

Daytime wetting

Each child develops bladder and bowel skills in their own time. Many are dry during the day by around 4 years of age, and others may need a little more support as they grow.

Daytime wetting often happens when the bladder gives strong urges with little warning or when constipation makes it harder for the bowel to work comfortably. This can look like:

• frequent toilet trips
• rushing to the toilet
• damp underwear
• difficulty emptying urine (wee).

Constipation (when faeces (poo) becomes hard, dry or uncomfortable to pass) can also play a big role.

Bladder and bowel control issues often happen together, and timely support can help. A nurse continence specialist, pelvic health physiotherapist or doctor can work with you to understand the cause and find approaches that help your child feel more confident.

Read more about Daytime wetting.

Bedwetting

Many children develop night-time dryness gradually, and this is a natural part of growing up. Most children are dry by the time they start school, while around 1 in 5 still experience bedwetting.

With the right support, most children continue to develop night-time bladder skills at their own pace.

Bedwetting can happen for a range of reasons, including:

• the body making a large amount of urine (wee) at night
• the bladder not yet holding large amounts of urine (wee)
• finding it hard to fully wake when the bladder is full
• a family history of bedwetting.

Many children grow out of bedwetting naturally as their bodies mature. If it continues past the age of 6-7 or if your child is distressed, it may help to seek support from a nurse continence specialist or GP (doctor) who can guide your family through simple, effective strategies.

Read more about Bedwetting in children.

Thanks for all your great advice. I felt like no one has been listening to me…now I finally have a plan to solve my son’s constipation issue which is causing the bedwetting.

National Continence Helpline caller, December 2025

Soiling

Many children need extra support with bowel skills as they grow, and one sign can be soiling – small marks of faeces (poo) in underwear or passing faeces (poo) outside the toilet.

Soiling is not caused by laziness or attention seeking.

Soiling often appears with constipation. Hard faeces (poo) can build up in the lower bowel, and softer faeces (poo) may leak around it without the child noticing. Over time the bowel can stretch, which dulls the body’s signals, making it harder for a child to feel when they need the toilet.

Constipation can happen for many reasons and often reflects where a child is in their development.

Some helpful things to consider include:

• managing previous discomfort – if passing faeces (poo) has felt painful, some children may hold on to avoid discomfort
• being busy or distracted, which can make it easy to miss the body’s signals
• feeling unsure or anxious about using the toilet, especially during times of change or stress
• occasionally, an underlying medical condition – a health professional can help identify causes.

‘Thanks for all your great advice. I felt like no one has been listening to me … now I finally have a plan to solve my son’s constipation issues which is causing the bedwetting.’

National Continence Helpline caller, December 2025

Practical steps to strengthen bladder and bowel skills

1. Create a calm, encouraging routine

• Keep toileting private and respectful – praise what your child can do eg washing hands, flushing the toilet, and don’t discuss their toileting with others in front of them
• Make the toilet easy to use – leave a night light on, set up a step stool and child seat so your child feels safe and comfortable
• Stay calm and positive when wetting and soiling occur – treat these moments as gentle teaching opportunities and move on without blame. Avoid punishment or shaming.

Find tips in our Toilet skills section.

2. Support healthy bladder and bowel habits

• Encourage regular relaxed toilet sits – encourage an attempt to pass faeces (poo) about 20 minutes after a main meal, and avoid rushing
• Offer water regularly and a variety of high-fibre foods such as vegetables, fruit, wholegrains, beans, lentils, nuts and seeds
• Check in with your GP (doctor) if you notice signs of constipation such as hard, dry faeces (poo), fewer than 3 times a week, straining, pain or any bleeding when passing faeces (poo), tummy aches, holding on behaviours or soiling. Constipation can be easily treated in most children.

3. Use simple tracking tools

Keep a children’s bladder (wee) diary and bowel (poo) diary to spot patterns and guide care. The diaries help you keep track of:

• when your child goes to the toilet
• how much urine (wee) or faeces (poo) they pass
• how strong the urge was each time
• if they experienced any leakage.

Tailor a plan – a nurse continence specialist, pelvic health physiotherapist or GP (doctor) can review the diaries, check for physical causes and design a plan with you that feels right for your child.

4. Explore treatment options with your health professional

Your health professional will check for any physical causes. They may also suggest:

Specialist continence therapy

A course of treatment with a nurse continence specialist, pelvic health physiotherapist or other child focused health professionals. They’ll help your child and family build skills step by step with practical strategies you can use at home.

Use our Find a service provider directory to search for specialists near you.

Bedwetting alarms

These alarms help children learn to wake when wetting starts. To set you up for success, your health professional will help confirm:

• your child is ready for an alarm
• your family is prepared for the night-time routine
• you know how to use the alarm and for how long
• your child has a clear plan to follow.

Families can support success by getting up when the alarm sounds, waking the child gently, helping change clothes or sheets and settling the child back to sleep.

Our Find a product directory lists suppliers and manufacturers of continence products around Australia.

For more on alarms and to talk through readiness, call the National Continence Helpline on 1800 33 00 66 for free, confidential advice.

Medicines for bladder and bowel issues

Most families see benefits from everyday strategies first. When more help is needed, a health professional may recommend medicines alongside other strategies such as:

• bowel medicines (laxatives): soften faeces (poo) so it’s easier and more comfortable to pass
• bladder medicines: some reduce the amount of urine (wee) made overnight while others help the bladder hold more.

Medicines can be short-term (eg for sleepovers) or part of a longer plan, sometimes together with an alarm.

Tracking progress

Try a quick weekly check to track your progress and celebrate small wins:

• Did my child notice and respond to their body’s bladder and bowel signals?
• Did they sit calmly and take their time on the toilet?
• Did we see longer dry intervals during the day or night?
• Did they drink enough water?
• Did they eat enough fibre rich foods – fruit, vegetables and wholegrains?
• Were toilet trips more relaxed, with less rushing?
• Were there fewer strong urges to go, or fewer leaks?

It can be helpful to pause toilet learning during stressful times such as starting school, a new baby, sickness or moving house, then restart when things are calmer.

When to seek help or advice

Children develop bladder and bowel skills at their own pace, and sometimes a little extra support can make a meaningful difference. A nurse continence specialist, pelvic health physiotherapist, occupational therapist experienced with continence care or GP (doctor) can help you explore gentle, practical strategies that feel right for your child and family.

Seeking support is important if your child:

• has ongoing constipation despite home strategies
• has soiling in their underwear
• was previously dry and starts wetting again
• is 6-7 years or older and still experiences night-time wetting, or becomes wet again after a dry period
• feels upset, frustrated or embarrassed by wetting or soiling.

These professionals work closely with children and families to understand what’s happening and create a tailored plan that helps your child feel supported and confident.

If you ever feel unsure about the advice you’ve been given – or if you’re told your child will ‘grow out of it’ without further guidance – you are always welcome to seek a second opinion from another qualified health professional who works with children.

Need help now?

Call the National Continence Helpline on 1800 33 00 66, Monday to Friday 8am to 8pm AEST (times may vary by state or territory). Closed on national public holidays. You can talk to a nurse continence specialist for free and confidential advice. You can also ask for an interpreter who speaks your language.